Adventures of one who is totally floored.

I am safe and sound even though the blog has not been updated. Been nice and busy with ministry and stuff. Stuff = shopping.

I managed to go and ask for a tour of the venue of the conference. I showed my business card and they said well they don’t do tours. I pulled out our sales material from the house of chops and then they were ready to talk. Back home I think is ahead of them. Thye have a lot of contractors they deal with. But some cool stuff happened none the less. In the Ballroom the carpet was immaculate. I asked how they pull that off. On closer inspection I saw how. They use very decorative carpet tiles. So when it gets stained they pull up the tile and clean it else where. Very clever. I have some other stories for another day but time is limited.

So Till Next Time Just Get A New Tile,

Chops

Theland where I come from tipping is not a issue. But here it is a different story. We have also been drilled as church delegates to do the right thing and tip as a witness.

Yesterday we had a buffett brekky. It was ok but the service was slow, inattentive and forgetful. I’m sorry you want 15-20%. But you can’t even get me a glass of water. I then had to remind her 15 minutes latter. And calling me sugah is not going to make things better let me just tell you.

Last night we had the direct opposite and was very happy to leave a 30% tip. The dude was attentive, courteous and realy helpful. Plus the brother bought me some medicinal ice cream after my massive meal. I was introduced to the medicinal qualities of ice cream after eating a large meal with the police state. A mouthful or two of ice cream actually settles the stomach. It made the 10 minute walk home that little bit easier.

Till Next Time You Better Earn That Tip,

Chops

Gentle reader, I have woken at 3.30 and have come down to the free Internet to tell you a quick highlight from the trip so far. In the hope the rhythm of typing will cause me to sleep.

Korea it is a swinging place. I could really get used to staying at a joint like the Hyatt. Oh man it was so nice. Because of the way things worked out I got a room to my very own. I was strutting around in my underwears and watching leno and that sort of thing. The cool thing I really liked was that there was a speaker beside the toilet you could turn on so you missed nothing from the t.v. With the door open you could watch the tv through the mirror.

After steaming up the room badly in the vein hope of getting crinkles out of my shirt i got out and the whole wall is a mirror above waist level. It was fogged up except the size of a normal mirror in the middle was unfogged. It looked so cool i took photos. I am now glad to report i am feeling more tired.

So Till Next Time Turn Up the Toilet,

Chops

After my first experience in a American church which by the way was pretty good. We have moved on to the conference. The convention centre is huge like most things here. But is not well planned out like the house of Chops. It is a rabbit warren and does not flow very well. The signage is poor and not very well lit. They also have about 20 or so gold carts that move around in front of house areas. The staff also push food around in front of house areas quite long distances. It really is not up to my usual standard and it just won’t do.

I had to go to the orientation for non american delegates. It is more designed for those of not the first world. Issues covered such issues as how to fill a bath tub (don’t use the sink tap to do this) and it is ok to flush toilet paper. Also gave them all the chance to try out the similtaneous translation head sets they have been issued with. Well I have a day of business tomorrow and need to be fresh for that and it is after midnight.

Till Next Time Use the Bath Tub Taps Ok,

Chops

Greetings to you gentle reader from the land of heavy smog Korea. The crew and I have left the gentle shores of Australia and en route to Chicago. I had a good flight. The rest opf the crew got stuck with mushroom porridge for brekky whilst I had the omlette. I was sitting in another section. We got here and stood in the longest line and slowest line. Many much adventures to tell but gotta go. Plane is going. Talk to you from Chicago!!

Till Next Time Can I get Another Bowl of Mushroom Porridge,

Chops

Thank you one and all for your very kind comments about my impending trip. I will be safe and sound. I am the only anglo travelling with 9 brothers and sisters in Christ who are of the Polynesian persuasion. There are few rough heads in the bunch who would be looking to relive some of the adventures from the old days. And don’t get suckered in some of the ladies are to be feared more than the blokes. So Ol’Chops well be just fine and dandy.

Till Next Time He Ain’t Heavy He’s My Brother,

Chops

Wow Mama. This time next week I will be in a large metal bird flying to the U.S of A. You may wonder where a event industry guy like myself goes on holidays. Well you guessed it I am off to a Convention!! My denomination has them once every four years. I am going to the youth part. With a band from my local church. Us southerners will show them how to rock their absolute socks off. It is a little surreal that finally is all happening we have been working on this since last November.

We have a friend at a university that is hosting us and my good friend K sue who has a link on this here blog is hosting us in Rural illinois as well. It feels a little weird that I am going to a very similiar venue to the one I work in. Hopefully I will be able to turn off from work mode enough to enjoy the spectacle. I am hoping to blog from there as much as possible to keep you up to date.

Till Next Time Can’t I Just Find a Normal Holdiay,

Chops

Part of my job tasks is to stay till all client enquiries are complete. I had stayed till aprrox 9.30pm and looked after a product launch. Slight problem was the product about to be launched had gone missing. Thus leaving quite large gaps in the room. Kinda hard to have a product launch wthout the product. We just put cocktail tables there so the gaps were not so big. It is all smoke and mirrors people. Very nice smoke and mirrors but at the end of the day smoke and mirrors. We cringe but punters say oh wow how nice. It makes me laugh sometimes.

But I had to stay till some very urgent and important documents arrived from the printers. DeNiro was please Chops it is really important that we receive them as all other departments will send them away and we need them when the client arrives at 0600. Before the items could be printed stuff had to be passed through parliament to allow the info to be published. It was supposed to arrive between 9 and 10. I thought I would stay till 10.30 and then good luck. At 10.23 security called and said we have a call you may not want to hear. It was the nice man from the printers saying it would not be ready till midnight. I asked how big is the delivery “öh two or three A4 paper boxes.” I have been sitting around for over a hour for 2-3 A4 boxes. My outside life counts for nothing if i can sit in a office for an hour just waiting. It was a kinda sad thing to realise. And then I lost the car in the car park. I really needed a hug. I went home and cried. I didn’t actually but I know it would have been much more dramatic.

Till Next Time Your Life Means More Than Boxes,

Chops

Wow, I never realised that a wee story about me getting misdirected in a car park would touch so many. It makes me feel warm and fuzzy really. It truly is a beautiful thing. But I think we should blow up all car parks so this happens no longer and we will stop feeling so inadequate. That sounds like a rational solution.

Till Next Time Feel The Love,

Chops

Some days i am surprised at the way I can sort out problems and issues. The complexity of solutions is a wonderful thing. I would even say I feel quite genius like. But other days I would be hardly able to light a 40 Watt light bulb with my brain power. After work last night I entered the car park and walked towards my car. Well, where I thought my car was. It actually was on the other side and I was heading to where the car was the day before. I stood there in the massive silence just not feeling all that bright really.

Till Next Time Lay Down Some Crumbs So You Can Get Back To The Car,

Chops