Adventures of one who is totally floored.

Not only does the chart teach Literacy it also teaches Etiquette.

Till Next Time It Is A Very Clever Chart,

Chops

On numerous occassions in this blog we have discussed the adventures of Steak Club. Well Gentle Reader thos days have passed and we have become a Pizza Club. It is very much the same thing and with the same people but it is Pizza. We arived at the Kangaroo Cafe (not it’s real name) and they offered us a private room. The owner introduced himslef and was quite excited to discover who we were and wanted to hear our opinions of his product. A interesting side note is that he shares the same last name as the proprietor as the House of Ribs and the Rainbow Connection informed us that they were brothers but there was a falling out. This would explain why one of the pizza’s is identical to one at the House of Ribs but has very unusual ingredients. This relationship has never been proven.

We ordered 4 family size pizzas which had 12 slices each so we went half and half and tried a fair smattering of various flavours. I was not overy impressed with the magherita or the pepperoni. But given they are very basic pizzas anyway that was not too much of a surprise. I enjoyed everything I had tasted. I enjoyed the camembert and king prawn, the tandoori chicken was very nice as well. It was a little hard to be critical as we don’t really have a schem for critique set up.

But a wonderful time was had and a good chance to catch up in a social setting. It is also good as several of our members are no longer in the employ of the House of Chops.

Till Next Month Which Pizza Is Best??,

Chops

I think kids need to eat more veges. But, as you can see there does not appear to be any actual vegetables in this dish. So I do believe it could be a vegetable dish cooked by father with no vegetables.

Till Next Time It Looks Like Beans And Not Vegetables,

Chops

Today’s adventure into the wild life of Chops and Mrs Lovely One may sound much more racy than it really was. But I could not resist the title. Also before we start the story proper if you are a visual person and you know me I apologise for any damage I am about to do to your psyche.

I was on night shift and finished quite early and was going straight from work to a party. I had a technical problem and needed Mrs Lovely One to rewash my favourite party shirt and bring it in so I could wear it at the party. Because I am a big boy now, I wear my uniform in and so I needed to get changed. I had also left my jeans in the car as well. I changed my shirt in the car park but was still a ways to go to transform from working stooge guy to sexy sophisticated party guy. I got in the car and while waiting for the lights took my shoes off. At the next lights I fully managed to get my pants off completely. I did not have the chance however to get the jeans on. I then waited till the next lights which was a couple of minutes away. It was getting a little chilly in the Chopsmobile when I realised the error of attempting all of these phsyical feats with the window down. I do wish to say it was dark and no one could see in anyway. I did manage to get the jeans on successfully as well as my slip on shoes.

For those of you out there who may think of trying to attempt this and be just like Chopd here are some hints for young players.

1. Do NOT attempt this in a manual vehicle.

2. Keep one foot on the brakes at all times (if possible).

3. Always apply the hand brake (see rule 2). You don’t want to hit someone else and have to put “I was changing my pants at the lights”. I am sure that would not go down well with the kids at the insurance company.

4. Always remember to take the hand brake off as well. Trust me in your rush this can happen and you will wonder why the car seems “sluggish”.

5. Ensure that all zippers/buttons are down. This will make putting the trouser on or off so much easier.

6. Try only to do one leg at a time. Otherwise you will get tangled and you will have one foot with which to drive with if the lights changed.

7. Keep your eyes open. Try and see what the other lights are doing so if you see the other lights go orange you know you have about 5 seconds left.

8. Don’t get pulled over by the Cops.

9. Only try this if you are Chops.

We safely arrived at the party with one sexy looking Chops and Mrs Lovely One and no one else at the party were the wiser that good ol Chops got changed in the car whilst driving.

Till Next Time Just Try It One Leg At A Time,

Chops

Yesterday morning Mrs Lovely One had to fly down south into the abyss of coldness for two days of business. It was the first time that we had been away from each other overnight since we have been married. I kinda lay there while the alarm went off which wasn’t so bad. I have been the one lately who has had the 5.30 starts and such so it was ok for Mrs Lovely One to get some well deserved revenge.

What wasn’t cool was when the taxi turned up early at 5.25 and Mrs Lovely One and then Mr Lovely One had to stumble out to make sure the taxi driver did not drive away. Well part of the problem was it actually was cool well really cool. The other problem was that had somehow misplaced my pants and as I stumbled aroudn in the dark I attempted to put on a tshirt as shorts. I thankfully realised that pretty quickly.

I do miss Mrs Lovely One possbly more than I originally realised. But hopefully she is bringing back a present for Chops.

By the way Mrs Lovely One it better be a nice present cause your alarm went off again at 5 this morning and poor Mr Chops could not get back to sleep.

Till Next Time Distance Can Not Seperate Love,

Chops

I have nothing to say except for the spelling mistake and why because of gender I assume is the rice cooked by father not savoury??

Till Next Time I Am Sure Father’s Rice is Savoury,

Chops

Mrs lovely One and I this weekend shared the first weekend off since we have been married. I don’t get a lot of weekend time off in my line of work. So we drove down to the Twin Towns (kinda it’s real names) and a stayed at a flash motor inn. Well it wasn’t that flash really but it will do. It had the cable tv that Mr Chops enjoys. We dined at a local restaurant which we had been to before and tried the seafood platter for two. It wasn’t earth shattering but it was a solid effort and it was ready really quickly.

The next day we drove further south and went to a small beachside town called Queensescarpement (not it’s real name) we came away with many bounties such as marinated fetta and some pretty good fudge. We also purchased some tomato relish and a jar of apricot and passionfruit jam. The standholder actually had all her winning certificates from the local show so you knew you were getting prize winning product. She even had sampling which was nice. I am not all together sure however that it would win first prize at the Murgon show. Sorry gentle reader a old Chops family joke there. I am not sure even if I explained it, it would make sense.

We then went further south to Byron Bay and on the way had to stop for road works. As we went past the stop go man I saw some genuine aussie brillance on display. The stop go man had his car parked on the side of the road and his portable dvd player on the roof of his car. Some would say that this was dangerous or lazy. I just reckon those who said that would just be jealous that they had not thought of it first.

Till Next Time I Am Not Sure How I Could Get One of Those DVD Players to Work In With My Job,

Chops

Had one of thsoe days where at the end of it, my job which some deem important and vital felt completley the opposite. I was at the end of my eight day straight run when we had a first aid emergency which resulted in someone dieing in one of the rooms I looked after.

Our first aid team responded really quick with a defrib and all the other stuff within 2-3 minutes. But unfortunately all their efforts resulted in now improvement and the person passed away.

But the whole time people kept chatting and doing their own thing. It just made me fell pretty bad and realise how rush rush the world has got. People barely considered what had happened and that made me feel a little angry I will admit. I had another client chuck absolute tantrum becuase we used the wrong type of chair in a set. I basically wanted to yell at him and say get over yourself and your precious chair their is much more important things to worry about.

Till Next Time No One Really Cares About The Important Things,

Chops

Today’s entry is one of my all time fav’s from the chart.

As you can see it has a typo which is gold. But the bread looks like no bread I have ever laid eyes on and looks a bit more like a swiss roll or something sweet like that.

Till Next Time What Comes Afler Bread??,

Chops

I have a spell checker set up on my email, so whenever I send a email it checks it automatically before sending. As regular readers can attest my spelling is usually pretty bad. It is more a keystroke error than not knowing how to spell and often I am tired and don’t proof read.

Such a case was yesterday when after 6 days straight of work and with morning starts at 6.30 and getting up at 5.45 Herr Chops is one pretty tired dude. I did my report yesterday and went to send it when the spell checker queried a word. It turned out to be someone’s name and I hit apply and whooshka it sent my report. I then called the poor victim of my stupidity and apologised for the error. They forgave me and said it happens often and they would not have known had I not said anything.

I looked at my email today and I got a email from C2FL asking me to spell people’s name correctly. I could not believe that I got an email over what was an fairly obvious error. But that the email that corrected me also had a spelling mistake in it which the spell checker looked like it had fixed.

C2FL did not think it was all that funny when I pointed that little tidbit out. The irony was absolutely dripping and palpable in the air.

Till Next Time Never Rush the Spell Checker,

Chops